Day
Ten: I want to hide a while behind your
smile
I’ve been
thinking a lot about heroes lately.
Bowie sings a lot about them, Hercules seems strong and amiable, the
possibility of a journey, an adventure, seems to be what draws me in. Coming off of a four-month-non-stop-adventure
and then settling in to a steady routine seems hard for me. I’ve already booked my entire weekend solid,
not including any down-time at all for myself, and I think that needs to
change. As much as I would like to say
that I am an invincible semi-god hero (as my acting professor likes to include
in all definitions of a hero) I am not.
I am human, Just Jessie, and I must admit a little tired.
I pledge
that next week I will take it a little easier, drink more tea, and smile
more. Those three things are integral to
my clean mind space I think, as well as continuing to write. I didn’t nurture the need to write today and
I sort of regret it, but I guess that can be held off for another time. I don’t have much in mind other than short
poetry anyway, I should start thinking about something more concrete before
starting anyway.
I am
happier right now than I have been in a long time. It surprises me, lovingly, that I can do this
right now. That I can confidently say to
friends and family that I can do this semester, as busy as it is going to
get. That I am content about everything,
and beyond all of that I am motivated to continue travelling, exploring new
things, and nurturing my friendships.
Gosh, my prof asked us today what we loved and I was going to say my
friends. I truly have no idea what I
would do without the grounding conversations, never-ending laughter, endless
support and love I get from each one. I
can only hope that I am that good of a friend to any of them.
Early bed
for me this evening, I think next week I might make a theme for each night so
that less posts tunr out like this one:
random and unorganised. There is
nothing I prefer less than an unorganised blogpost. I’ll think about this and get back to you.
Goodnight,
X
Jess
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