November 10, 2013

314

Day Three Hundred and Fourteen:  On the Cusp

It’s not a breakdown, it’s a tidal wave.  I feel like jumping.  Not off anything or into anything, but just in place.  I think that’s how to best explain how I feel.  I feel like jumping.  Not dancing, not singing not doing work I just feel like jumping.  I feel like stomping on this place where I am and making it disappear into the ground below me.  I wish I could jump it out of my system.  Like, come on, just jump it out.  Jump on it.  Jump around.  All of that jazz, just JUMP!  It isn’t like I’m going crazy or anything, we’ve known this for a long time, it just becomes less organised in here (my head) when I jump.

So I’ve embraced it.

I jump on every task that I had on my to-do list today.  I am jumping over the idea of writing for playwrighting, and I am jumping on holiday idea’s.  I like to jump, jump in spot, jump over on under, jump under, how fascinating, wouldn’t it be great to just jump under things?  Jumping under things seems like I wouldn’t even have to acknowledge that they exist, to jump under, to jump under the tunnels of those things, to jump around them isn’t enough, because then I’d know they were there, but jumping under…

I’d like to jump under Monday.

I think if I jumped right now the person living below my room would not appreciate it, so instead I will talk about how satisfying jumping would be.  Wouldn’t it just?  Jump.  Jump under the complicated, gravity-filled issues of today and jump into sleeping for the night.  I’m not avoiding, because unfortunately jumping doesn’t erase anything, these things will all be here tomorrow, when I won’t be able to jump any longer.

I think I just need to face things, right?  Is this too personal for my blog, now?  Someone told me a few weeks ago that when they read my blog it felt really personal, I feel like I’ve drifted away from writing my advice-focused blogs and into…deeper things?  Things that I wouldn’t care to publish.  Is that a problem?  Do I care?  Should I?  Do you?  I don’t know anymore.  My blogs tend to reflect my mood, or I try to make them that way, is that an issue?  Am I a bad blogger?  Probably.  I’m bad at keeping up with the posts and making them relevant to other people.  Here, let me try to make this all relevant to you:

Do not procrastinate.

Because that’s the function of this post for me at the moment, aren’t you happy I made that connection?  Perfect.  Moving on, jump on.


x

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